July 8th, 2010

Brian

Disclaimer: If 50cent, snoop dogg and Queen Elizabeth can rap about their “niggers and hoes” i can blog about my black Naruto homie.

If I didn’t had any morale I would’ve got laid so many times at the expo. At least, according to the signs a lot of cosplayers were wearing. Where you might only find a lonely, bitter and disillusioned anarchist handing out “Free hugs” at your local tourist attraction; at the expo they played the “Free” game to a much larger extend. Many girls offered themselves for free hugs, kisses and and -cover up the ears of the young kids- free sex. Now any normal person would probably laugh and not take these guys serious but we’re talking about cosplayers here. They’d fuck anything with a hole in it and you’ll be able to find countless of evidence online. Not saying there is anything wrong with it; just saying it doesn’t float my boat.

On Thursday we actually planned on going to the expo to see if we could get stuff signed and of course meet the girls. As I was the only one with a day-pass instead of the 4-day-pass i was left feeling empty and alone, walking the “gray” mile towards a whole bunch of uneconomicals. Uneconomicals is the petname I give to weeaboo who walk around with signs that offer people free hugs, kisses and sex.

Behold… the long waiting line where those who wish to enter the expo have to line up. At one point I was convinced one out of three lines actually ended up at a gas chamber but thank god I was wrong. Well… my line didn’t end there anyway. There was only one good thing about standing between anime weeaboo and that is that I actually didn’t had any trouble playing Pokemon on my phone in public. What I did have problems with however was one kid graphicly explaining the best way to cut his wrists (i.e: down the road not across the streets) and one thing amazed me in general.

It was a black fucking Naruto. That’s right, no jokes there. Out of all the cosplays I’ve seen (and I’ve seen some bad ones) this one was the worst one of all. He could’ve dressed up as Afrosamurai, a well respected and well known animecharacter. He could’ve even dressed up as someone from the Boondocks (as far as you count that as anime) and all would’ve been fine. But this dude was just wrong on so many levels. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not a racist and I despise racism: but how would you feel if you saw a white guy dressing up as Tu-pac or Martin Luther King? You’d chase him all over town telling him how wrong it is. That’s what you’d do.

One thing else that I found odd was the amount of girls dressed up as cats. Or well, trying to dress up cats really.

1. Buy cat ears at your local sex shops
2. Buy some sexy lingerie there as well
3. ????
4. YOU ARE NOW A NEKO

For fucks sake, if you go for the whole neko girl outfit make sure you wear a tail as well. *sigh* Weeaboo’s… you just have to tell them everything.

Tags: Martin Luther is my home boy, Morning Musume, Paris, Tsunku
Categories: French Foolery, Japan Expo
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July 5th, 2010

Brian

First of all let me begin by announcing that I’ve only met a handful of French people who weren’t complete ignorant homos with their heads and their accents stuck up their Frenchy anuses.

Now that I got that out of the way: Paris was awesome. It was really super fucking awesome. Best weekend of my life? Not too sure, but it’s surely at the top of my  “Best weekends EVAR” list. So much happened that I’m actually going to make multiple posts about all that happened in France. What can you soon expect on this blog? A quick overview:

• Nigger Narutos – My revised opinion on why white and now black people also  should not be allowed to cosplay.
• Fucking French – Except for a few, most of them are fucking dickheads. I’ll tell you why in this post.
• Street Sleeping – Because nothing says “Dedication” more than sleeping on the streets waiting for your favourite idols.
• A Convivial Concert – Dehydration has probably damaged by kidneys and my voice is gone. Was it worth it? (Hint: Yes)
• The Signing Session – Meeting the girls after 4 years of fandom. Holy shiiiiiit!
• Sexy H!O people – You think I’m the only sexy wota? Think again!

Full metal excitement from Wednesday to Saturday  without hardly any sleep. It was an amazing experience that I’m glad I didn’t miss out on. I got to tell Reina she’s my number one Idol and I got to tell Aika “suki desu”. Believe it or not but she’s actually alright in real life. Shame my love for her only lasted for a day or so!

I thought the wota inside me was gone: but it’s back again and bigger than ever!

モーニングすさまじい

Tags: France, Japan Expo, Morning Musume, Paris
Categories: French Foolery, Hello! Project, Japan Expo, Upfront Agency & Works, Wota Worthy
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